Credit: Dallas Steele
Porn star and uber daddy Dallas Steele is the gift that keeps on giving when it comes to the amount of details he’s provided over the course of my 3-part interview with him.
He’s opened about his long career in the news world, the death of his partner Kelly, what it’s like being in the adult industry and his advice for men who want to get into it.
The third and final part of my exclusive with him goes even further into the life of this chiseled and gorgeous men. He chats about transitioning out of the business, breaks down porn’s biggest stereotypes, a major goal he wants to conquer and so much more.
Do you think it’s hard to transition out of it and find success elsewhere in life?
I don’t know yet. I guess we’ll see when I retire from movies. I think in the corporate world, it may be hard to transition out, yes. But I do think that’s changing. Think about it. There are cameras virtually everywhere we go these days. Couples- straight and gay, often record their sexual exploits and share them with friends. In 20 years, it’s going to be hard to find many people who don’t have a video out there somewhere. Hopefully, the world gets past the idea there is something wrong with people producing movies for pleasure. Porn is the #1 industry on the internet. Someone is watching. I’m pretty sure it’s not all horny teenagers.
You live in Palm Springs, California and are in a relationship with a guy named DJ. How does he handle what you do for a living and has it ever been a big deal to him?
I LOVE Palm Springs! We moved here in August of last year from Dallas. I have never felt such warmth and kindness from people. Now, I must explain, I have two boyfriends- DJ and Jason. I’ve been with DJ for almost five years, Jason joined us four years ago. Before my late partner Kelly died, he had been talking to DJ on Facebook about coming to be our houseboy in Dallas. One weekend in July 2014, Kelly invited him to spend the weekend with us. Sadly, Kelly got called to a photoshoot in NYC and missed DJ. The two of us hit it off and decided then that DJ would have to come back in two weeks. Kelly died the weekend before he was to return.
Jason, in his early fifties, met me online. He works in a high-level professional occupation and prefers to keep his private life private, which sometimes does pose a challenge around me. DJ is 35, and while all are together, it’s more the Mormon model. I have two boyfriends, we share much together, including chores, vacations, and a bed, but the two of them are not romantically involved. Both are incredibly supportive of my unusual occupation. They watch my movies but know not to watch them with me. It’s like having a director’s cut of a movie with a running commentary the entire time! And no one enjoys porn with a commentary. I’m by far my own worst critic- I was in TV news, and I am as well in porn. In 23 years of TV news, I felt I did maybe 12 excellent stories. Of the more than 50 movies I’ve made, I feel there have been maybe 5 excellent ones.
What’s the biggest stereotype you would like to debunk about your fellow gay porn brethren?
Wow, so many to choose from! I think the biggest misconception is that we’re all stupid. When I was working for Titan, it was not uncommon for me to be the only actor on set without a master’s degree, or even Ph.D. Many of the men I’ve shot with are brilliant in their respective fields. Some of the younger actors I’ve shot with, not so much, but certainly not all of them. Men over 30 in porn are generally easier to work with. They come in prepared, they have the clothing the director requested, they have whatever special lube they want, they demonstrate a positive attitude, they’re not constantly on their phones, and most of all, they’re not massively F’ed up on anything.
The other thing that pisses me if is the notion that all of us in porn are DTF (you remember Jersey Shore) with anyone, anytime, anywhere. Uh no. Just like anyone else, I have preferences. And if I’m not working for studio, I get to choose who I’m going to have fun with. So just because you watch my porn, don’t hit me up with “hey, I’m in Palm Springs, let’s bang” without sending so much as a greeting or a picture! Rude. Presumptuous. Whether I meet you in person or online, I expect to be treated with the same respect as anyone else. If you come at me like I’m some utility, you get blocked. Period. I’m not your “bro,” I’m not your “dude.” I prefer “Sir” or “Dallas” or “Jim.” Daddy also works. Poor grammar and poor speaking ability is a huge turnoff for me.
Do you have a goal or achievement in life that you would like to conquer?
In five years, I’ve created a very strong brand in Dallas Steele. Between two Facebook pages, Twitter and Instagram, Dallas Steele is followed by more than 187,000 people. My average weekly impressions on Twitter usually top 3 million. I’m often recognized, even overseas. When I was in TV news, I was lucky to have 3,500 followers. And yes, sex sells, but I think it’s more than just sex. I don’t think I’ve got the greatest body or the biggest equipment. I think I’m okay, or maybe just a little above average on a good day. What I am good at is marketing. It doesn’t much matter what you’re selling, if you’re excited about it, if you’re good at promoting it, people will be attracted to it. I do think I’m probably considerably more genuine then most porn stars, certainly more accessible. I do my best to answer every email from every fan.
Long-term, I want to diversify the Dallas Steele brand into non-porn, but still fun, sometimes sexy interesting content. What vehicle that is for me, I’m not sure yet. I’d love to do a talk show of some sort whether on cable or online. Or maybe do some of some of daily YouTube moment each day in this life of mine. Most people would not believe much of what happens. I’ll be 50 in November (yes, Scorpio). I’ve never been happier or felt more accomplished. I’m totally open to whatever possibilities the universe may throw at me. If you have an idea, ask me. I’m working towards competing in Masters Bodybuilding in 2020. I competed from 2003-2008 in Texas. My plan is to live to 95, so I’ve got 45 more years of living to do. That means telling myself daily that I’ve only got six months. If you’ve ever been lucky enough to have a brush with death, there’s a good chance you’ve started living.
In conclusion, what has been your fondest memory in the business, whether it’s been with a fan, director, scene partner, etc?
I will NEVER publicly share who my favorite screen partner has been. Doing so would needlessly hurt the feelings of all the incredibly sexy men who I did not choose as a favorite. Add to that, it would be awkward to show up to a set to work with a familiar face only to have them say “I know I’m not your favorite, but let’s try to get through this.” No thank you. What does stick in my mind, both with Titan in Palm Springs, and more recently, Bareback That Hole, in Las Vegas, is “family.”
With both of those studios, you stay all together in a big house. You eat meals together. You enjoy the pool together. You go shopping together. And yes, the talent in the house, all eventually has sex together on camera. But far from being a bathhouse, it feels more like summer camp. You form this unusual sort of family where after all the shooting is done, you sit and talk about your life, and sometimes it’s laughter and sometimes, it’s tears. And you know many times, you may never see that guy across from you again. This moment may never happen again, so LIVE IT, savor it, feel it in your heart.
