It started out with a kiss, how did it end up like this…
A hilarious tweet about a drunk kiss has gone viral.
Jake Johnstone is the gay man behind the tale.
He explained in his tweet, on a night out he kissed someone he thought was a gay man.
It turned out it was actually a lesbian.
To add salt to the wound, she had kissed him because she thought he was a lesbian too.
Today marks a year since I kissed a very attractive twink in Brighton and then found out she was a lesbian who thought I was a lesbian.
— Jake Johnstone (@hijakejohnstone) September 25, 2017
Johnstone told GSN the entire tale
‘WELL! Me and my theatre producer pal Chris decided to go on a spontaneous trip to Brighton a year ago just for the sheer campness of it all. The original plan was to get a late train back to London. Except, as two people from the north who don’t know when to say ‘enough is enough’, we got so utterly shitfaced that we had to get a last minute hotel in Brighton instead.’
‘Except, as two people from the north who don’t know when to say ‘enough is enough’, we got so utterly shitfaced that we had to get a last minute hotel in Brighton instead.
‘So we checked in, drank more, and off we went into the streets of Brighton, finally ending up in Legends. I’d already met a rather lovely looking guy earlier in the night but went our separate ways.’
Then this was when things started to go downhill.
‘More booze was flowing, the night became a blur of drag, dancing and gin and tonics. I don’t remember much after that apart from walking down the street back to the hotel with two massive hickies on my neck like it was 2006 at the high school disco.
‘Chris was on the wind up saying that it was the girl who gave me them but I didn’t understand what he was talking about. What girl? Just put it down to drunkeness, I guess.’
Johnstone had absolutely no idea what had happened until Chris told him.
‘I woke up the next morning feeling like a train had hit me. Chris started laughing and told me the whole story. How I was on the dancefloor at Legends and kissed this very lovely looking twink.
‘It was quite a passionate kiss too until we both broke apart, realising our error. I thought she was a cute gay man and she thought I was a lesbian. The worst part is is that I had stubble too, but hey, it’s Brighton. To be expected.
‘I was so hammered that the night is just a distant memory but from what Chris told me it was a pretty mortifying albeit hilarious mistake to make and we both took it quite well. Gays, eh?’
This is so Brighton! Great story.
— Shaun Gunner (@ShaunGunner) September 25, 2017
It’s not just Twitter who love the story
The following morning Johnstone ‘went to the bathroom and saw the massive hickies on my neck and looked at Chris.’
Thankfully neither of the hickies were from the lesbian.
‘I had just got lucky twice that night, even if one of them wasn’t (fully) my cuppa tea,’ Johnstone added.
The tweet hasn’t been as well received by some, however. Johnstone has been accused of hiding his real gender and sexual identity.
He hit back: ‘People are actually using this to shoehorn in/justify their batshit gender identity politics when it was literally just a drunken mistake.’
He also explained his story not only went viral on Twitter, but also Tumblr.
His original tweet has over 2,000 retweets and 13,000 likes.
A screenshot of the tweet has over 56,000 notes on Tumblr – This is a combination of shares and likes.
Johnstone concluded his chat with GSN with the line ‘I’m a gay Bridget Jones.’ Iconic.
