We all know that gay sex is awesome – from the very first fantasies we have, through to the moment we first try it and right up to our lives right now. But of course, after a while it can also get less frisky and less new and exciting, especially if we’ve maybe been with the same partner for a while. What can we do to help bring back a spark and make our sex lives really go bang?
Switch it around
We all know the kind of guy who’s a ‘total bottom’ or ‘total top’ – maybe we ARE one of those guys! Even if not, if we’re in a relationship it can be easy to fall into a habitual pattern of who does what – and while habit and be comforting, they’re hardly exciting. So next time try switching ‘round your usual preference; especially if you’re in a couple, this is a way to bring a whole new facet to your sex lives
Different times
Gay couples often end up having sex at similar times, and even when we’re not in a couple we tend to focus on sex at the same kind of time, in the same kind of place. Again, this is habit, and breaking out of habit is great for making sex sparky. At different times our bodies feel different – maybe more alert or more sensitive, or stronger, or more sensual.
Focus on more than orgasm
Especially for men, focusing on orgasm can become an all-encompassing purpose in sex. The thing is, sex is about so much more than climax; it’s about exploring each other’s bodies and the sensations we can bring to one another, and ourselves. Some guys can find it hard to orgasm with another person, and moving focus away from that and to all the other delicious sensations of sex, we can relax more into what is, after all, meant to be an amazing, fun experience.
Focus on body away from main erogenous zones
Again, it can be very easy in sex to focus on just a few areas – down by the crotch or the ass, maybe up by the nipples, and the mouth. But think how much we’re missing out on! Our bodies have so much to be explored, and each part feels different, and different kinds of touch feel different everywhere! There are armpits, the nape of the neck, the small of the back – the back of the knees, even (which can be deliciously sensitive, with the right touch!). A good way to explore this is with massage, but any time can be used as a great opportunity to truly explore each other’s bodies.
Communicate!
As with so many things, great sex ultimately comes down to great communication; so the most vital tip is to communicate with your partner This goes for everything, from what feels good (and what you’d rather they didn’t try again!) to any fantasies you have, what you like about how they look, how they feel, how they taste. Keep a good communication flowing, and good sex will follow naturally.
