It may seem like a movie scenario to you and this is exactly what I would have thought couple of months ago. I am Matt, from California, I am 27 years old and my life took a turn for the weird in the past few weeks. The reason I write this is because I could really use an advice from anyone, a supportive thought or anything that would help me understand what is going on and what should I do. I thought love is pretty easy to deal with. I mean it is nothing complicated about it, you just fall in love and remain with the person your care about forever if that is the case. But what happened to me recently left me stumbling for the truth and so far I have reached nowhere.
I have always lived with my mom and I have had a normal life so far. My father left us when I was not born yet and I have never had the chance of meeting him. I could not say I feel bad about it. My mom told me that he ran away with another woman soon after he found out that my mom was pregnant with me and this is something I simply cannot respect in a man. A true man should stay with his family and assume his responsibilities not run away as soon as the situation gets too hot. My whole respect goes towards my mother. Especially since she has accepted my identity as a gay individual and has been fully supportive during the last couple of years since I first came out to her. I must say I kind of expected her to support me, because I know her and I know that she cares about me.
Now here is where my problems have started. I met a guy lately and we really got along quite well. We met through some friends and while we had a rough start, now we are more than close. He seemed to me a bit arrogant, but it turned out that he was actually quite a decent guy and we kept meeting on various occasions with our common friends until we began getting along really well and we felt an attraction building up between us. That is when I found out that one of our common friends knew that he was also gay and tried to hook us up. Needless to say it worked and soon we became lovers.
His name is John and he is 24, 3 years younger than me, but he is quite mature and intelligent. For me it seemed like he was the perfect catch; we shared the same passions, we liked the same things and I don’t think we have ever argued seriously about anything. Yesterday was our one month anniversary together, as a couple. I thought it would be a great idea to make him a surprise and make a t-shirt inscription with his full name. So I looked through his ID and I found out that his name is John Stevens. My family name is also Stevens and I found it to be an amazing coincidence, despite the fact that this name is actually pretty common. So I made the inscription and after the day passed, we discussed about this aspect. I think I mentioned it as a joke, I didn’t considered to be of much importance, but then the discussion went on and we started talking about our private lives. That is when I realized that we have never had such discussions before. What he told me next was probably the most horrible thing I thought I will ever hear. His father had been previously married and had another boy with some other woman, but he had never met his brother. That is when I told him my name, as well as the fact that my life story was somewhat identical, except I had never met my father. It was that moment when we realized the awful truth, which my mother confirmed when I presented her with a picture of John’s father. John is my brother that I have never met.
I am in an awkward situation now, because I really love him and I know he also loves me, but the fact that we are close relatives is something that none of us expected to find out. We decided to take a break for now, but the attraction is stronger than ever now, like everything forbidden is.
I don’t know what we should do, because this is a sensitive matter. I would appreciate all the help I can get.
