My bio on Grindr read: “Be trans friendly. Send face to chat.” It was difficult to be on a gay hookup app as a trans woman. Most men in my feed desired to only sleep with each other.
But I knew there were straight men on Grindr who hungered for a woman like me. I wanted them too. That’s where I met Jack. At 22, he was a few months older than me, and, other than his age, his entire profile was blank, usually an indicator of a cisgender straight man who was guarded about his attraction to trans women.
Typically, the messages I received would start with a vulgar sext, sometimes an unwanted nude photo. Living in Morningside Heights, I was attending Fordham University for my master’s degree in strategic communication.